Lyrics, Songwriting and Arranging

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WSAO / Andre Avino 1mo+15dy ago
Hi folks, can someone help me to polish this lyric? Lyrics is for this song: https://www.kompoz.com/music/collaboration/1221020/bounces Any suggestion, alteration, modification are welcome. Thanks heaps! Control Freak: Verse 1: I can see in your eyes You?ve got that look again Turning red and getting high And I freeze my brain Frustration streams Nasty insults overflow Loud mad screams The truth exposed Chorus 1: Damn! How do you become such a control freak? Your behaviour starts to make me sick If you get angry don?t put me down You?ll be alone I?m gonna leave this town Verse 2: Why can you be so cruel With someone that loved you Causing pain that never heal Was the good time not real? Psychological harm Where?s my private life? You?ve been gone too far but I can handle a knife Chorus 2: Damn! How do you become such a control freak? Your behaviour starts to make me sick If you get angry and try to put me down You?ll be alone I?m gonna leave this town I won?t lie to protect you this time I'll fight back if you cross the line Bridge: I?m sick of abuse and coward threats Touch me again and I?ll make you regret Chorus 3: Damn! How do you become such a control freak? Your behaviour starts to make me sick If you get angry don?t put me down You?ll be alone I?m gonna leave this town I won?t lie to protect you this time I'll fight back if you cross the line I had enough of your attitude I won?t stop until you get screwed


   

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Milo   commented 1mo+15dy ago


Verse 1: I can see in your eyes You?ve got that look again My brain starts to freeze It never ends Nasty insults flow Loud angry screams For the slightest offense You go to extremes Chorus: Control freak! You make me sick I?ve had enough of your attitude Find someone else to abuse You?re a control freak Verse 2: How can you be so cruel To someone that you love? You don?t know what love means I?ve had enough All you cause is pain Just let me live Psychological harm Is all you can give Chorus Bridge: I?m not putting up with your cowardly threats Touch me again and you?ll have a lot of regrets Go and be angry But don?t put me down You?ll be so screwed, you?ll have to leave town Chorus

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WSAO   commented 1mo+14dy ago


Thanks Milo! Really good insights and ideas. I'll work in some of them to adjust the vocal metric. Really appreciated!

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Milo   commented 1mo+14dy ago


Try to keep the first and second verse phrasing identical so you can use the same melody both times. You re welcome. It was fun.

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joel_sattlersongs   commented 1mo+14dy ago


interesting

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JeanLui   commented 1mo+14dy ago


Curious that my profile picture is seen, as if someone had entered with my account

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Chris1970   commented 1mo+14dy ago


"The difference between childhood and marriage, is my mother was never so angry, hurtful and bitter" (Just something I thought up recently) Ain't relationships awesome.